i sometimes awaken to realize that i have been building my hope on things other than Jesus' blood and righteousness.
and then somehow, i can't figure out what happened when things go wrong.
o me of little faith!
LORD, save me from myself.
Friday, July 1, 2011
Friday, June 3, 2011
i am tired.
OF:
- sitting looking at my computer screen
- reading this heretical textbook
- trying to focus
- staying up too too too too too late too consistently
- missing out on hanging out
- having to cut short good talks because i'm going to be up all night as it is
- suuuuuper OD-ing on caffeine... today: 1 cup of coffee, 1 rockstar, 1 doubleshot latte, 1 cup of tea... and that's less than yesterday
- sitting sitting sitting sitting AHHHhhhhhhhh
- checking the page count
- procrastinating, and how guilty i feel because of it
- having short times with the Lord
- being ineffective in relationships because of my exhaustion
- being short-fused paired with the malfunctioning filter on my mouth
HOW MUCH COMPLAINING I HEAR COMING OUT MY MOUTH
- sitting looking at my computer screen
- reading this heretical textbook
- trying to focus
- staying up too too too too too late too consistently
- missing out on hanging out
- having to cut short good talks because i'm going to be up all night as it is
- suuuuuper OD-ing on caffeine... today: 1 cup of coffee, 1 rockstar, 1 doubleshot latte, 1 cup of tea... and that's less than yesterday
- sitting sitting sitting sitting AHHHhhhhhhhh
- checking the page count
- procrastinating, and how guilty i feel because of it
- having short times with the Lord
- being ineffective in relationships because of my exhaustion
- being short-fused paired with the malfunctioning filter on my mouth
HOW MUCH COMPLAINING I HEAR COMING OUT MY MOUTH
Monday, May 30, 2011
spring term is kicking my butt.
kay. i'm lacking perseverance. i feel the weight of the work i have yet to do before this term ends (in 1.5 weeks.....!!!!), but i am too afraid of it to get near it. can't tell you how much wonderful hanging-out i've been doing these past days, totally loving the time spent there, but with a double motivation - 1: seeing my dear friends, old and new; 2: avoiding the very daunting task of finishing what i've begun. rather ignoring it in hopes it will go away.
...it is not working.
here is a list of things i am jumping-out-of-my-skin-excited to do when spring term bites the dust:
1. house-sit (try out independence for 2.5 weeks)
- sit in a quiet house alone
- have ample space to think
- try out cooking for myself
- have company over like a grown-up
2. finish jane eyre
3. lie on the floor with my eyes closed and listen to my new bon iver album
4. go running. frequently.
5. watch my x men movies i've received in the mail
6. deep-clean my bedroom
7. intentionally and intensively plan my going-ahead plans
8. journal extensively
9. go on coffee dates and walks with the Lord
10. wake up early because i want to, not because i have to
but in the meantime, i resolve to search out the beauty in each day and not just wish them away. "this too shall pass" and all that.
...it is not working.
here is a list of things i am jumping-out-of-my-skin-excited to do when spring term bites the dust:
1. house-sit (try out independence for 2.5 weeks)
- sit in a quiet house alone
- have ample space to think
- try out cooking for myself
- have company over like a grown-up
2. finish jane eyre
3. lie on the floor with my eyes closed and listen to my new bon iver album
4. go running. frequently.
5. watch my x men movies i've received in the mail
6. deep-clean my bedroom
7. intentionally and intensively plan my going-ahead plans
8. journal extensively
9. go on coffee dates and walks with the Lord
10. wake up early because i want to, not because i have to
but in the meantime, i resolve to search out the beauty in each day and not just wish them away. "this too shall pass" and all that.
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